Life throws us curve balls, blessings, discoveries, and death. After all, the other part of life is death, right? I think the hardest part about death is understanding that no one really dies. Even though I work with energy on a daily basis, it’s hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that he’s not coming back. The physical presence is what we miss the most when someone is gone, the way they light up a room, the way they make you smile. The conditions. But it’s not about me or you. It never was. The only experience you can control is your own. We all have the choice to decide how others are going to affect us and if we are going to be controlled by conditions or circumstances.
The absence of someone can bring both strength and sorrow, and the decision is not an easy one to make when you’re sitting at home with an empty lap and an empty heart. I’ve been wanting to start a blog for a while now, and I had no idea the death of my dog would be the inspiration. If he were here he’d have his head draped across my lap with his ears flopped back against my keyboard’s space bar soidhavetotypelikethis.
Even I can forget amid sadness, that energy lives on, and what others do with their life experience is out of my control. Today I was reminded that energy is eternal. This reminder came in the form of a wooly aphid (eriosomatinae)…. Which I asked him for. You’re going to look it up, aren’t you? Do it. They’re awesome… they look like little flying fairies. I’ve only seen one once in my life, so what better of a sign to ask for! Yesterday, a week after his physical departure, I received hundreds of them. I am not even joking, it looked like someone blew a giant dandelion across my yard. When my husband got home, I was holding my hand in the sky jumping up and down, catching five or six at a time, yelling, “He sent them! He actually sent them!” My husband and I walked around the yard for the next five minutes just laughing and reminiscing and trying not to accidentally swallow any! A few hours later, they were gone.
As I write my first post, I encourage you to release control of whatever it is you’re holding on to that isn’t yours. Whether it be in your job, your relationship, or with an animal, let it go. If you want your experience to change, spend more time focusing on you and your emotions, and watch how the world around you changes. I lost my dog as a result of chaos, and it was a strong reminder to control my contrast better, and to appreciate the conditions around me but not to be controlled by them or their absence. I always say that animals are our greatest teachers. Chreedy’s lesson was to grab life by the balls and hold on tight. If you don’t believe me, tell me how a daschund can jump out of a truck going 80mph down the highway and live without a broken bone, get swallowed up by the Rio Grande and live to see the next day, swan-dive off a ten-foot wall (twice) after a squirrel and press on, get completely squashed by a horse without a single broken bone, and still manage to jump, swim, and run years later.
Even though I think we should all live a little harder like Chreedy did, I’d like to remind everyone that you are the creator of your life experience. You control what happens next. How are you going to spend tomorrow? Being controlled by conditions or experiences, or grabbing life by the balls and making peace with where you are, knowing you are in control of what happens next.